Can You Truly Manifest Your Dream Man?

We all have them and please don’t try and hide your face as if you’re not sitting on a "build a man list", too…LOL. Yes! That “build a man” list that you have hidden that you take a peek at every once in a while, to verify if the guy that you’re dating could be "the one”. Yes ma’am that list! We’re talking about that dream man we hope to cross paths with soon…like TODAY!

I completely understand the want for a “build a man” list because truth be told girrrrl I have one too. It started out as my five non-negotiables for my next relationship/marriage because let’s be clear ya girl is a wifey. I’m just waiting on my husband, you know the man that don’t play games, adores me like I adore him, the one that’s a leader and a provider and I will not settle for less. I’m not the woman that you can hold hostage with sex. Like sir, what else do you have to offer me? I’m waiting for not only my dream man but a man I can build with. Let me address what I mean by “dream” man. I do not mean a man that’s unrealistic that I hold to a higher standard than what I’m also willing to provide. I’m not looking for perfection because we all know, no one is perfect however I’m waiting on what God knows I need. So, with that being said, I will not settle for a Netflix & Chill situationship…umm sir I’m too grown for that!

Now, back to the topic. My five non-negotiable list is now at forty-one. Sis, don’t judge me because God knows what number you’re on right now. Here’s what one of my male friends asked me a few days ago...Why do women create these lists?

Why sir I’m so happy you asked is how I began as I proceeded to respond. I preface this with “these are my opinions and my opinions alone.” When you deal with a big bowl of “Hell Nawl” with a sprinkle of “WTF is dis ISH” in every relationship you start thinking… “ok God I know you said to trust you but let me help you a little bit because it seems to me that you forgot a few thanngz. Women are tired of always dealing with men and their representatives so therefore we have these long lists of characteristics that we desire to have in our future men because ENOUGH ALREADY with the B.S. we’ve been getting.

Relationships are hard and if you’re not evenly yoked it will lead to issues which then leads to hurt feelings, disagreements and sometimes disrespect. Let’s not mention if you decide to have sex without truly knowing if he is even in the ball park of what you desire. You now have added unnecessary emotional baggage that you will need to heal from if it doesn’t work out.

I’m not the one for casual sex. I’m just not designed for it. I need more than to fulfill my fleshy temptations. I’m well aware of how spiritual sex is and how you can’t be out here giving access to everybody. All I’m saying is sis, be careful out here in these single streets. We’re in the business to conquer our goals and live stress free. We do not need nothing else weighing us down while we’re slaying our goals and building a dream life.

When I first created my “build a man” list it was essential because it gave me the opportunity to explore what I really wanted and what I felt I really needed because in the past I kept missing the mark and ignoring the red flags. We all have core values and you never want to go against what truly matters to you. You will have to make sacrifices in relationships however you shouldn’t have to compromise who you are and what you care about. I’ve had my list for a little over a year and I’ve decided to tear it up. I know I’ve been doing all this talking about this build a man list and now I tell you that I’ve torn mine up....Girl hush and hear me out. After I created it I never really looked at it until here recently.

Everyday I pray to God about my next companion and I know he knows what I need not just what I want. God is so funny he’ll sit what you need extremely close by and you won’t even recognize that it’s for you until you almost dismiss it. For an example, when you’re in a rush to leave your house and you’re looking for your car keys and you can’t find them anywhere then BOOM all of a sudden your keys mysteriously show up in the very same place you just looked for them like they’ve been there this entire time! Ugh, that’s how God does things. He intentionally let’s you overlook what he’s placed in your atmosphere so that when it all comes together you then in fact know that it was Him.

With all of that, yes I did tear up my list and I’m learning to have faith and be patient. I hope this entry blessed you and made you ponder just a little bit about your “build a man list.” Hold on he’s coming girl!

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